Wednesday, March 10, 2010

A very dark day.....

It pains me to write.....because the emotion and sadness that's going on with me right now is...overbearing. But, I feel as though I should let everyone know.
At 4:30am this morning, I woke to a screaming and convulsing kitten. I'm not going to type the situation all out, because....it's too hard. ...but it was Oscar, my little guy.

After sitting with him and trying anything I could, while scurrying the internet trying to find a solution and having no luck getting an answer on something I could do..... I called the emergency line for our local vet office (a pet 911)... a technician returned my page about 5 minutes later... and while I was mid sentence.....my poor little Oscar quietly left this world while being cradled in my hand......

I'm completely destroyed right now.... it's too hard to even think about....

My thought is that while everything has looked okay, I don't think Rosie is paying attention to their needs enough.... and I think they're much more undernourished than I thought.

Runt isn't doing very well either.... and I'm waiting to hear back from Pet Save to inform me on what steps need to be taken next. Litterhead still seems to be latching on the nipple okay, and is quite round looking..... but Runt continues to struggle.... and we continue finding him alone in the middle of the floor when we go in to check on things......

I need advice......and lots of hope....right now. I can't believe all this has happened in such a short time..... I wish I knew what had happened.....

I'll try to update as I can.......sorry to have such bad news......... I feel...terrible.

33 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry, that must have been awful, I had a pet lamb die in my arms a few years ago and I'll never forget her. I wish I had advice for you but I've never had kittens. Best of luck with the other two.

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  2. oh no, how terrible! can you take them all to the vet? i don't know if vets usually check out newborns.

    i really have no experience, but i'd start bottle-feeding and stuff yourself and see how it goes.

    ugh, i don't even know what to say, but i'm sorry. :(

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  3. Oh, I'm so sorry... Everything seemed to be going well, but that shows we never know... Please don't blame yourself for what happened, you did your very best!
    I can't give you any advice, but I think seeking help and guidance from a vet or another experienced source is a good idea.
    Sending you lots of love and hope... <3

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  4. How terrible for you.
    I haven't ever raised kittens although I may someday - but it sounds like maybe the advice you will get will be to bottle-feed at least Runt on the sly to keep him fed. Also maybe Rosie isn't producing enough milk and needs some hormone support or something? I think I have heard that they do that.

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  5. I have no advice really (though I suspect they'll recommend you start bottle-feeding Runt and keep an eye on Litterhead), but I'm so sorry for your loss of Oscar. I know how much it hurts to lose a little one you've gotten so attached to. ::hugs::

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  6. My heart is breaking with you! I'm so sorry you had to experience and go through such a difficult time. But certainly you know that little Oscar was at least in your loving arms when he left this world. If you hadn't taken in Rosie, who knows where those sweet babies would have been born.

    I wish I had some wise advice for you but I do not. I like the other's advice above about getting some extra food into the wee ones with some bottle feeding. Hopefully Pet Save will give you some guidance soon and the other kitties will be fine.

    Best of luck, thinking of you my dear friend, xxoo Catherine

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  7. I'm so, so sorry to hear the news. I am just catching up on foster blogs after being gone. I can only imagine how devastating it was to lose Oscar in such an unexpected way.

    Thinking of you, Rosie, and the babies. Hoping for good things for everyone.

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  8. Oh my goodness, I'm adding my condolences to everyone above. I can't imagine the devastation you must feel. But, as Catherine said, Oscar was in your loving care when he went.

    hugs to you and the rest.

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  9. (((kittykye)))

    I am so sorry I haven't been by all week. And I am so sad for your loss and continuing worries. I understand how devistated you must be. I agree, start bottle feeding and seek professional advice as soon as you can. A vet will have had much more experience and be able to provide better guidance.

    You gave Oscar love, warmth and comfort from the beginning to the end and I know he felt the love. It's little comfort, I know, but anyone who fosters for any length of time will experience the pain of loss - just know what you are doing is so important for Rosie and her babies.

    I've lost two kittens and my wonderful vet has assured me that sometimes we do everything right and it can still happen. Kittens are an amazing mix of very resilient and very fragile. So many things can go wrong. I've read that sometimes young mothers don't do well with their litters and don't produce enough milk. If there is something congenitally wrong with her babies, the mom can sense it, which might explain Rosie's lack of interest in her litter (and would mean there was likely nothing you could have done to save little Oscar, either). Or Rosie may be ill or have residual problems from the delivery that may not be obvious.

    I will be keeping you, Rosie and the babies all in prayer. All my love, Lisa

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  10. I am just so sorry to hear about your little one. I left a comment earlier today, but I see it's no longer here..

    I basically said what Lisa said before me. Sometimes these little ones just aren't meant to be in this world. There's really nothing we can do for them.

    I know this doesn't make it any easier. I've lost a few myself. But please know that you are a blessing for them. They need you now, and others will need you in the future.

    My heart goes out to you during this very sad time. You're doing a wonderful thing.

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  11. I really just wanted to tell you that my sisters and I have you in our thoughts and prayers.

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  12. how are you and the kits doing?

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  13. What a frightening thing to happen. We can imagine you are upset, to say the least. We are sorry for your loss. Warm purrs, tail wags and {{{hugs}}}

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  14. I had my beloved Maine Coon die in my arms a few years ago. It is very devastating. But you did everything you could, and he did die while being comforted and loved. My thoughts go out to you.

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  15. Oh I'm so sorry about sweet Oscar...I know how devastating it is to go through what you just went through...sending you our gentle hugs and healing purrs.

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  16. I will be praying for you and your kittens.

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  17. i am so sorry to hear about the loss of little oscar. i understand that the loss of every little loved one is just terrible. and while this is a rough time, i also want to thank you for taking care of these babies and their momma. without your love, oscar would not have had a warm and loving home. as sue said, some babies are just meant to be angels. you are a blessing to us all by having the room in your heart and your home to foster animals in need. big hugs, puglette

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  18. i am sorry for your hurt. sending you good thoughts. xx

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  19. Think how much joy you gave the kitty in it's short life. As hard as it was for you, that kitty got some serious loving! Good for you for being there.

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  20. My heart goes out to you. Please know you did everything you could given the situation. This kitten did not die alone; he was in your arms being loved.

    You are doing great and important work. Thank you for caring for these kittens.

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  21. :( I agree with the feeding of them yourself. My step-dad breeds Shar Pei's and sometimes the mothers will eat the babies o_o I had my dog die in 2007 from a tumor in her lungs. It was a choice between her quality of life on chemo or our happiness for just one more month with her. We had to put her down. I never cried but I miss her so much. I have three cats, one is my own, two are my mothers. We got her from the pound and she had giardia. She was so so sick. So frail and tiny. But she grew up into a fat cat. Then she swallowed an elastic headband and had to get surgery in her tummy. I was so worried.

    Sue makes a lovely point, some kittens are just meant to be angels. I'm not a religious person but I would imagine that the children that die young get paired up with all the puppies and kittens that die young. I know when I was younger I wanted every single kitten.

    Stay strong. You've got a lot of support out there.

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  22. i just wanted to let you know there are many people out here who are with you in their thoughts. the thing is, i've been following your blog and the pitter pats for quite some time now, and sometimes i'm so envious of the wonderful time you get to spend with the kittens, and how many great cats come into your life. i honestly never thought about the downside to it, and this just really got to me, i realized how hard it can be the (thankfully) few times one of the kittens doesn't make it. i wish you strength; don't be too sad; at least you had him for a little while, could enjoy his sweet personality and soft fur...
    all the best from germany :)

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  23. Thank you for caring for these furbabies. Foster families are angels on earth.
    These kittens have known warmth and love even in their short lives. I'm so sorry to hear about Oscar, tears are streaming down just reading -- I can't begin to imagine how you must feel. Your love shines through though. You did all you could, his last minutes were in caring hands.

    I hope the others pull through and grow up to be happy, bouncy, round little kitties.

    Sending healing thoughts and hugs your way.

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  24. All kinds of hugs your way. Bless you and every other person who takes in fosters. Sometimes they leave in the most wonderful way to a good forever home, other times, being the little and vulnerable ones, they leave too soon. But at least they've known love and warmth and nothing but caring from humans.

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  25. I'm so sorry to hear about your little guy. I'm sure you did everything you could. I don't have advice, but I'm sending my thoughts and hopes for many happier days. Thanks for helping the little ones.

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  26. My heart goes out to you and your kitties. You're doing everything you can, and most importantly, you're giving them all the love they could ever ask for. Thank you for giving so much.

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  27. I've come from Itty Bitties and Pitter Pats - and I've nothing of value to add either, but virtual love and cheers. Imagine ALL of us, out here, hand in hand with kitties strolling in and out between our legs, sending energy and love your direction to you AND the kitties. If you could feel prayers like a breeze on your face - you'd be all but blown away!

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  28. I'm so sorry. I'd love to give you a hug and let you cry it out, help you let go of the pain of this experience, but a virtual hug will have to do right now. Oscar is no longer in pain, and he was not afraid. His life was too short, but he was loved and cared for and touched. And as all of us who love our big and little cats will tell you, Oscar will be in good company in kitty heaven.

    Hang in there. Lots of love and a big hug from Portland, Oregon.

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  29. Thank you for giving these little ones a chance. As one who has adopted many orphaned and special needs shelter cats over the years I so appreciate the effort and love they all received from their wonderful foster moms. Your caring makes a huge difference in many lives, furry and not - no matter how long or short they may be. Best wishes - Laura, Roger and the furry boys: Thomas, Jake, Billy, Darby, Lenny & Cool Hands, Luke in Tacoma WA

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  30. Sending you and the kittens warmth and support. And echoing everyone who thanks you for the love you show the fuzzy babes.

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  31. We are so sorry you had to go through that. It must have been awful. Thank you for caring as much as you do, and for loving so deeply. You are in our purrs and prayers.

    Your friends at Animal Shelter Volunteer Life
    http://animalsheltervolunteer.blogspot.com/

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  32. Thank you for loving and caring so much. I'm so sorry little Oscar slipped away.

    Lots of hugs from your IBKC friends. xoxxoxo

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  33. We're so sorry to hear about little Oscar. Sending purrs for the other kittens and to comfort you,

    Charlemagne and Tamar

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